It can be stressful as well as painful to stay in a relationship which has lost the level of warmth it earlier had. Communication to a relationship is like oxygen to life , when communication dies, the relationship itself dies. Here are 8 signs to know if you’re wasting time in a wrong relationship.
1. Lack of communication
Living in silence is often the first warning sign that all is not right in the relationship. However do not confuse this with the companionable silence that couples share in a long, satisfied marriage. There it is a case of two people knowing each other so well as to be comfortable in their silence and not having the need to make small conversation. But in case of a disintegrating relationship, the silence makes for an arid, loveless atmosphere where two people have nothing to share anymore.
2. Lack of common interests
Remember the early days of dating when you tried out so many pursuits together? While it is natural that over time each partner finds his or her own niche in the relationship, it is unusual for the spouses to give up all shared interests. If you find that you no longer do anything fun or interesting together, consider it as a warning sign on the health of your relationship.
3. Physical appearances no longer matter
In the early days of a relationship, couples take great care of how they appear to each other. Over time as the comfort level increases in a relationship, partners become much more relaxed about the need to look “perfect” for each other. However if you find that your partner has undergone a sudden sharp decline in matters of appearances and hygiene, it could be because your partner no longer cares whether or not you find them desirable. This complete lack of interest is an indication that your partner is no longer happy in the relationship and couldn’t care less whether you stay or leave.
4. Arguments on the same issues
If discussions on your relationship seem to have got stuck in a rut with the same arguments again and again, it is evident that your relationship is in trouble. The inability to communicate thoughts and feelings effectively is often the initial step towards a breakdown in a relationship.
5. You don’t figure in your partner’s plans
When talking about future, if there is an indication that you are not part of your partner’s future plans then it is unlikely that the two of you will remain together for long. Unless of course, he/she goes through a life-changing experience and realizes the value of a committed relationship which is again putting too much store by chance and therefore not worth wasting your time for.
6. He/she doesn’t ask you about yours
In a reversal of the above point, a guy or a woman who is not into you will also be uninterested to know about your life goals and hopes for the future. The present – comfortably carefree and uncomplicated – is good enough for him/her. He/she does not want to know if you want to eventually settle in the suburbs or how many kids would you like to have. If you find all this true in case of your date, then it is better you stop wasting your time in this relationship and start looking for a guy or girl who is ready to be more emotionally invested in you.
7. You don’t meet each others families
One of the surest signs that a relationship has a future is when partners feel ready to bring their respective families into the picture. If an individual keeps his/her love life and family life apart, there is little chance of the relationship continuing in the long run and you may be wasting your time here.
8. You do not share basic values
No matter how strong the chemistry, a relationship can only last when two people share the basic values on life and love. And if this is not the case in your relationship, maybe you are wasting your time. This is not to say that love cannot happen between people of different cultural or religious backgrounds but that for a relationship to survive in the long run, it helps if they feel the same way on what is and is not important in life.